15 Women Explain How They Deal With Their Boyfriend’s ‘Overly Affectionate’ Female Friend

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Data gathered from real women on Reddit

1.

I would assume he could handle it himself. If he specifically told me it made him uncomfortable but that he didn’t know what to do, I’d have a conversation with him where we decide the best course of action, and then give him support and encouragement while he pursued that action.

— Little_Lion

2.

I had to tell my boyfriend it makes me uncomfortable so he is less open towards these women.

I saw a picture with his girl friend on him with her legs wrapped around him. Nope. Not okay. He thought it was okay that his girl friends touched him like that, I would NEVER touch my guy friends like that. But then again I hate being touched.

— hsock

3.

I trust that my SO is mature enough to tell me if he doesn’t want to be with me anymore. I like giving hugs to my boyfriends and he knows it, cause we have some friends in common. Obviously isn’t the same kind of hugs I give to my SO and he knows that too. If he wants to hug a friend, girl or boy, it’s okay, we are the same type of person that loves giving hugs.

We are sure that we love each other and that there are some things that the other would be uncomfortable to see, and we don’t do it in front the other, neither behind our backs. We trust each other.

— nachoandrockets

4.

I’d remind my SO know that I’m not comfortable with that, and ask him to talk to the friend about it. If that’s not an option, I’d ask him to cut down on contact with her. And if he didn’t agree with that, then we wouldn’t be right for each other, because it’s a personal boundary of mine to avoid partners who don’t draw the line between appropriate and inappropriate with their friends.

— cactusflowers

5.

The same way I deal with any sort of other relationships (friends, coworkers, acquaintances,etc)…trust him to handle himself. He’s an autonomous adult capable of making responsible decisions.

— tricaratops

6.

I would probably get really jealous, and let my partner know how uncomfortable it makes me feel. I feel as though my partner has good judgment though, and probably wouldn’t be comfortable with anything that would make me uncomfortable.

— MlleWeirdo

7.

Over-affectionate in what way? She’s all over him hugging and stuff? I’d trust that he would know boundaries enough that he’d ask her to stop – as that’s not exactly appropriate for the situation (of him being in a relationship).

If he didn’t think to handle it himself, I’d talk to him and let him know how I feel about the situation respectfully and let him know I’d prefer if he put a stop to it.

I have no problem with my SO having female friends, there are just limits that should be in place in my opinion.

— barkingsquirrel

8.

You let him know that it makes you uncomfortable. If it keeps up, it helps to remember this: If you’re jealous of another woman, you’re probably with the wrong guy.

— LulubyCacharel

9.

We already tell each other whenever someone flirts with one of us. If he, or I, had someone in our lives being “affectionate” (which reads to me like crossing the line physical contact) I would want it shut down. I expect my spouse to tell the friend they have to step back from their “affection” actions, even if it damages the friendship. Same on my end if I was the one with a friend crossing the line.

— TheNamelessOnesWife

10.

I would trust him to deal with it. He would not be okay with a woman who is not me in his personal space physically or relying too much on him emotionally. He’s set a boundary and expect her to abide by it and if she didn’t, he’d reconsider the friendship. I honestly wouldn’t have to say anything about it. It would be handled. That’s because we both agree part of being married is deciding that as far as opposite sex relationships go, we are going to fulfill that need for each other and any other friendships are going to have to take a step back.

— whats_her_face34

11.

It’s inappropriate period. If he is your man it is hands off. No exceptions. Over affectionate is just an excuse. All parties should understand why this is a no no. If not, then there is something they are holding on to.

— charkbite

12.

Most of our friends are overly affectionate, so it wouldn’t bother me. It’s not unusual for a lot of physical affection to go on between the men and the women in our friend group, including hugging, kissing, lap sitting, cuddling.

Anything beyond that, my SO would put a stop to.

— iownakeytar

13.

I would have a conversation with my partner and explain that this friend is making me extremely uncomfortable. If he didn’t act horrified, and immediately take action to fix the situation I’d have tons of alarm bells ringing.

I have been cheated on enough times to know when something is up. Trust your gut.

— Monztur

14.

He’d either be shutting that shit down or our relationship would be.

Don’t tolerate that shit. Nuhuh. Don’t care if that means I’m jealous and possessive. Not gonna tolerate some chick cuddling all up in MY partner no fucking thank you.

— kaywhaaat

15.

My ex and I had this “mutual friend” (neither of us liked her lol) who would always try to be all over him when she saw that I was around. It’s funny because I wasn’t threatened at all, just confused. I wouldn’t really be all over anyone in public, let alone someone who’s taken.

He would just hug her back then distance himself. We would laugh about it later. I don’t think he was as comfortable with me having guy friends like that, so I know he tried to make it clear to his female friends that it wasn’t okay.

— bellalama Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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