22 Life-Changing Lessons I Learned in 22 Years

How To Tell The Truth About Your Life

The thing about life is that whatever you conceal is what owns you. It becomes the only thing about who you are, because it is the only thing that you will not let out into the world. When you say your life is great when it’s not great, when you’re hurting, when you’re on the downswing, you subtly give yourself permission to lie about who you are, to allow what other people think of your life to mean more to you than what you think about your life. There’s only one reason people lie about the state of their life: for the benefit of others.

When they say that the truth will set you free, what they mean is that you will be free from the burdening weight of having to conceal who you are. The truth will set you free because you don’t realize that whatever you’re ashamed of, whatever your secrets are, whatever the ugly is, whatever the messy is, becomes the focus. It becomes the thing that holds you hostage, imprisoned from a life in the light.

The truth is your light. It’s what will beam out at the people that surround you. It’s what will connect you. When released, it hits the sunlight and beams brighter. You may think your truth is ugly and petty and weird and unacceptable, but releasing it from its shackles will purify it. It’ll hit the air and disintegrate. There is nothing to fear.

We are not connected by perfect. We do not relate to neatly-tied bows and surface skimming conversations. We don’t crave the leftover scrapped sentences of how you are, of who you are. We crave the full, rich meat of who you are and how you are. Your truth is what gives you dimension, flavor. Your truth is what exposes who you really are, deep buried underneath who the world has allowed you to be. Your truth is what makes up the intricacies of your being. Your truth—when released out into the open air—gives other people permission to release theirs. Your truth is the continuation of connection.

To tell the truth about your life, you must first radically accept the truth and present circumstance of your life. You must look inward to every last darkened corner slinking around inside your mind and silently affirm, “I radically accept you.” To tell the truth, you must first acknowledge your own complexity. This is not as simple as you may think it is. In order to acknowledge that you are more than a body, more than this one dimension, you have to step into an unknown, a humbling and vast unknown. You must wholly and completely accept that you are more.

You will radically accept that which you think you need to change. You don’t tell the truth about your life, because you hope the truth will shift, change, mutate, before you have to share it. This is backwards. In order to be set free, you need to accept that there is nothing which is trapping you now. In order to be set free, you must acknowledge and accept that you already are. Accepting that you are enough now feels like it is accepting that this is all there is, no bigger feeling, no grander moment.

But, do you see? In the radical acceptance. In the truth telling. In the allowing yourself to be here now fully without contingency. This opens up the grander moment. Because, when you release the truth about your life into that vast open air, you give yourself space to expand. The path to the grander moment is to accept that the one you’re in right now is the grandest one. The way to a more intense feeling is to accept that you’re feeling the most intensely right now. And, when you tell the truth and empty your heart bare and you accept—radically accept—this moment as the purest, grandest, most beautiful moment, you give the universe permission to rush in with purer, grander, lovelier, lighter, brighter moments. This is how you tell the truth about your life. This is how you empty it bare and let yourself become more. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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